Friday, May 19, 2017

If Mangoes Were People

Three good things happened this summer and all of them have to do with mangoes.






Thing #1: I was introduced to a new variety of mango called Imampasand. It tastes a little like Benganapalli, but is much stronger in flavour and makes my taste buds quiver and go weak in the knees. I think it has displaced Malgova from my Pedestal of The Most Awesome Mango, you guys.

Thing #2: Mango curry. But this needs a post of its own, once my taste buds have recovered from their blissful coma.


Thing #3: I heard about two mangoes local to Goa called Musarat and Mankurad. Musarat and Mankurad! Mankurad sounds like an underground mafia lord. Musarat definitely sounds like it was named after an Israeli spy.

So of course I had to make a list of some other mangoes and what they'd be like if they were people.

If Mangoes Were People

1. Imampasand: An affable sufi poet with a large belly.

2. Musarat: A dark, handsome Israeli spy with a dense, bristly mustache and a suave smile.

3. Mankurad: A feared mafia drug lord with perpetually flared nostrils.

4. Malgova: A freckled, plump aunty who loves feeding people.

5. Benganapalli: An IIT aspirant who is so thin people sometimes think he is two-dimensional.

6. Alphonso: A rich, pompous businessman who dazzles people with his smile.

7. Neelam: A beautiful artist who is the object of everyone's attention.

8. Badami: An old historian who wears thick glasses and grandfather chappals.

9. Tothapuri: A talkative little boy with a red nose.

10. Raspuri:  A gossip-loving cook who likes to pretend she lives in a Bollywood movie.

11. Safeda: A cleanliness freak with OCD and a love for minimalism.




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